There's more to wedding stationery than the requisite invitations. Before those are sent out, you may want to mail engagement announcements and save-the-date cards. For your wedding day, you will likely have printed programs, menu cards, seating cards, and other decorative accents. And after the event, there are thank-you notes and announcements - your first correspondence as a married couple.
Engagement Announcements
Printed engagement announcements are rare these days, but not unheard of. They can be an elegant way to deliver your news, and they make wonderful keepsakes. These announcements are most often sent by the bride's parent s and worded simply: "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith announce the engagement of their daughter, Katherine, to Mr. Timothy Johnson." Or you may issue the announcement yourselves, including when and where the happy decision was made, if you like.
Save-The-Date Cards
Though not required, save-the-date cards, which inform would-be guests of when and where your wedding will take place, are helpful - particularly if many guests will have to travel to the wedding, if it will take place during a holiday weekend, or if hotel accommodations nearby are scarce. They are usually mailed four to six months before the wedding. The cards can be handmade or printed by a stationer. While they are usually less formal than wedding invitations, save-the-date cards create the first impression that your guests will have of the wedding, so you want them to reflect the style of the event. But even if you are having a traditional wedding, you can express yourself in creative ways, such as by making a save-the-date reminder in the form of a refrigerator magnet. For a formal event, the cards can be worded simply: "Please save the date of Saturday, the ninth of November, for the wedding of Katherine Smith to Timothy Johnson." For a more casual wedding, you might say, "We're getting married! Please save the date: November 9, New York City. Invitation and details to follow," with your names below. You may put only the essentials on the card, or you might include more information, such as accommodation and travel details, to help guests get started making their plans. Save-the-date cards do not require a reply; you can include a phrase explaining this to your guests and also letting them know that the invitation will follow. No doubt a few guests will respond anyway, telling you how much they liked your card and that they look forward to joining you at the wedding.
The Invitation
Somewhere between traditional etiquette and creative expression lies the perfect wedding stationery - invitations that will tell your guests where to be, when to be there, even what to wear, all in a way that quietly reflects the two of you. The most formal invitation consists of a white or ecru sheet of high-quality cotton or linen rag, folded once, measuring either 5 ½ by 7 ½ inches (Embassy) or 4 ½ by 6 ¼ inches (Classic). French-fold invitations are a popular variation: They are folded in half twice, once horizontally, and once vertically. Four-ply cards (heavyweight paper, often with beveled edges) are another elegant style. Unique invitations can be created by incorporating colored card stock or inks, borders, die cuts, wax seals, icons, and ribbons into the design. Invitations should be mailed no longer than eight weeks in advance of the event - more if you are planning a destination wedding. Some brides prefer to address their own invitations, while others have a calligrapher write out the envelopes. In addition, it's nice to use pretty stamps - printed with hearts, flowers, or fruit, say - and ask at the post office that they be hand-canceled, an added touch that says no details has been overlooked.
Elements of the Invitation
The presentation of your invitation should be considered as carefully as its wording. In the past, a piece of tissue was inserted to prevent smudging. With today's more stable inks, some couples forgo this. However, to be sure your inks arrive intact, request "not for machine handling" at the post office. Most invitations are mailed in a double envelope, one inside the other, for protection. The various elements are stacked by size in the inner envelope, with the largest card on the bottom. Each piece faces the back, so that the recipient sees printing when the envelope is opened. Save a few extra sets for parents, attendants, and your own archives.
Typestyles
A good stationer will offer a wide selection of typefaces - different shapes and styles of lettering. Most couples choose a script style, an idealized handwriting; others choose a more informal, matter-of-fact typeface with or without serifs (the short lines stemming from the ends of the letters). Instead of printed type, you might hire a calligrapher to handwrite an invitation, which can then be reproduced.
Choosing a Motif
An icon or monogram is a great introduction to the spirit and style of your nuptials. For example, you might use a sea-horse icon for a beach wedding or a flower icon for a garden one. Icons and monograms work best when they recur, used on all printed material that your guests will see - from invitations and reply cards to menu cards and place cards. If you choose a monogram, use only the bride's maiden-name initials for cards mailed before the ceremony, such as save-the-date cards and invitations. Items that appear afterward can display your new monogram as a couple. If you prefer not to have two different sets of initials, use the first letter of each of your first names. To find an image, leaf through old books and architectural drawing, clip art, or samples offered by your stationer. Be aware of copyright laws, however. Icons or letters taken from extremely old books are usually free from copyright restrictions. However, there are laws that govern most modern illustrations and books.
Calligraphy
The word "calligraphy" is derived from the Greek kalli for beautiful and graphia for writing. The paper, ink color, and style of writing can influence the effectiveness and choice of calligraphy, and therefore, all should be considered together. Calligraphers recommend paper stock with a smooth vellum surface; highly textured paper will catch the nub of a pen, and ink can smear on a shiny-coated stock. A calligrapher's repertoire is likely to include interpretations of classic engraver's styles. To find a good calligrapher, ask for referrals from your stationer, friend, or wedding planner. For formal wedding, English or London scripts are popular. Italic styles are more suitable for casual events.
Printing Methods
Engraving:
Letters are etched onto a metal plate to be rolled with ink. Paper is then pressed onto the plate, picking up the ink in the etched line, leaving a raised image and indentations on the reverse.
Thermography:
A resinous powder is applied to slow-drying ink that is then heated to produce a raised surface. The results are similar to engraving but without the depression formed by the metal plate on the reverse.
Letterpress:
This was once the most common form of printing. With letterpress, raised type is inked and stamped on the paper, with an effect that is almost the opposite of engraving. Small print shops using letterpress can still be found and often be the source of exquisite stationery.
Lithography:
This method originally involved stone slabs and grease pencils. Updated, it is usually called "litho," "offset litho," or just "offset," and produces a crisp, flat image.
Matchbooks, Napkins & Other Printed Items
There might be other items you wish to personalize with your names or monogram, including matchbooks for the bar (which guests may take home), cocktail napkins and coasters, or printed ribbon for decorating your favors. If consistency is important to you, see if the same stationer will print such items as well.
Wedding Announcements
Notifying the world that you've married can happen only after the exchange of vows, but you will need to print your wedding announcements well before then. Small weddings and elopements are the most common events for which printed wedding announcements are sent; the recipients of a wedding announcement, by the way, are not obligated to send a gift. A member of the wedding party of other trusted person usually mails the cards the day after the ceremony (assuming the newlyweds are on their honeymoon) to those not included on the guest list.
The wording should be straightforward: "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and Mr. and Mrs. Robert Johnson have the honor of announcing the marriage of their children, Katherine Smith and Timothy Johnson," followed by the date and location of the wedding. Some couples prefer to announce the marriage themselves: "Ms. Katherine Smith and Mr. Timothy Johnson announce their marriage," with the location and date beneath. Occasionally, couples prefer a third-person announcement: "Ms. Katherine Smith and Mr. Timothy Johnson were married."
You may include your new contact information on the announcement itself or on a separate "at home" card that you mail with it. Don't forget to state the date after which you will be "at home."
Thank-You Notes
There is one wedding custom on which everyone agrees: Every gift must be acknowledged with a personal, hand-written thank-you note. Traditionally brides wrote the thank-you notes, but today, many couples divide the duties (you might each write notes to your own friends or parents' friends). There are two common formats for thank-you cards: a stiff 5-by-7-inch card on which you can write on both sides, or an "informal," small fold-over card, typically 4 by 5 inches. Remember, acknowledgements sent before the ceremony can be written on stationery bearing the bride's maiden name or monogram; formal notes sent after the wedding may carry the couple's names or new monogram. You may choose paper that contrasts with the wedding invitation, eschewing the usual ecru or white paper for something colorful. This is acceptable as long as your writing can be clearly read against the background - blue or black ink works best.
The right paper and pen might make your notes beautiful, but it's what you write that will make them meaningful. The salutation ("Dear.") should always be followed by a comma, not a colon, in a handwritten note. Three or four sentences is plenty as long as they are personal and reflect your relationship with the giver. Include a specific mention of the gift, why you like it, and how you plan to use it: "What beautiful wineglasses you sent! They will be a lovely addition to our table, and we hope you'll come over for dinner soon and enjoy them with us. And thanks so much for being part of our wedding day." The words "thank-you" usually go in the first sentence, although they can stand on their own at the end of the note. The note may be signed only by the author, or you may each sign in your own hand if you like. Just make sure that whoever is writing is representing both of you.
Ideally, gifts that arrive before the ceremony should be acknowledged with two weeks. For gifts sent afterward, you have two to three months to complete the job. It's easy to let a backlog accumulate. It helps to establish a system for keeping track of the presents you receive and of who gave what. One solution is that you might want to keep an index-card file or annotate the gift cards themselves. Wedding gifts will begin to arrive soon after you announce your engagement, so be prepared.
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It is true that a beautiful idea can change lives and a wedding is probably one of the biggest occasions in anybody’s life. Thinking of the right ideas can certainly make the wedding truly memorable.
